Sunday, November 29, 2009

Entering the 3rd trimester







Wow! I can't belive I am entering my 27th week of pregnancy, which also is the first week of the third trimester. I am on the down hill slope! If we do indeed induce on February 26th, we have approx. 12 weeks left until we meet our sweet daughter, Adalyn. This is such a busy time of year, and I am thankful for that because it makes the time go by faster. I am ready for her to be here! But we still have A LOT of preparations. I have been working on her hanging letters (that will spell her name). Instead of paying like $25 a letter I decided I would just buy plain wooden letters and paint them and tie hanging ribbon on them myself. I reeeaaalllly should have known better since I don't have a craft bone in my body. After my second attempt at painting them, three of the letters are bound for the trash. It has kind of been a disaster. The first time I painted them I did not weigh down the plastic that I put them on and it blew up on top of them and dried on to them. My brother was kind enough to sand them down for me so I could start over and I continued to make a disaster out of them the second time. I accidentally sprayed some sort of carborator spray on one of them and it ate through the paint and the leetter itself, and the other two just bubbled up where I had screwed them up originally and it looked like crap. So I guess I will be buying three more letters and trying again. Hopefully I can get these right and get to the ribbon part....I can ony imagine how that will go with my luck and lack of craftiness. Other than that. I am feeling pretty good. Some things are getting more difficult.... like bending over and getting up....oh and going up the stairs without feeling like I am going to pass out. But Addy kicks and moves all the time which is so amazing. I can even see it sometimes now. My book says she is just a little over two pounds. Who would have known that something that small could come with so much extra baggage...around my thighs and ass! I just keep thinking that it is all for her.....and pray that I will be able to get it all off after she is born. I have started having some weird baby dreams. I dreamed one night that I had her and that she was premature and very small...however seh was completely health and could talk in full complete sentences like an adult. Kinda creepy. Then just night before last I had another dream that I had her and that she was a giant baby...like the size of a 1 year old. And also that she had the longest most beautiful eyelashes. Don't know what that all means. I guess weird dreams are normal. At least I havent had any crazy labor dreams yet. I actually do not feel afraid when I think about labor and delivery. I know that at the end I will get to see her face, so it just seems like nothing compared to the reward. Everything that comes after....now that is a whole different story. I pray every night that I will be a good Mom and I will be able to raise her the way she deserves. I pray that we are both parents that will make her proud. That is a big responsibility. On a lighter note....Justin changed his first diaper this weekend. Julie let him change Lucy...it was a peepee diaper, but he did pretty good. He didn't know which way was the front and back, so we should see some interesting things when Addy does get here. I can't wait to see him handle his first poop! We have quite an adventure ahead of us!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Will I ever wear my jeans again?

Today was our 6 month check up. Adalyn is doing great! Her heartbeat was 152 beats per minute, and she is growing and moving and developing as she should. I on the other hand, had an absolute breakdown through the entire appointment. Why do they insist on taking your weight at the front of the appointment? It just makes you depressed. At 24 weeks I have gained 29 lbs to date. I am tipping the scales at 193 lbs. Holy crap!?!?! It just broke my heart. I know that I am pregnant and I am supposed to gain weight. I want to do everything I can to make a healthy little nest for Adalyn and to have a healthy pregnancy....however....the weight gain is really hard to swallow. I couldn't stop the tears! I was embarassed and I felt rediculous but I couldn't stop! I could not stop crying and sobbing and shredding the kleenex that the sweet nurse gave me. Dr. Chauhan was not concerned about my weight and said that everything was fine, and I belive her, but it still hurts. I just look at my monster thighs and wonder if my body will ever look the same again. I have struggled with my weight my entire life. I have never been happy with my figure until last year when I lost 35 lbs. to prepare for the happiest day of my life...my wedding to my wonderful husband. I walked down the isle at 150lbs in a size 8 wedding dress and I felt fantastic!! I had put a little of my weight back on of course after the wedding and honeymoon was over, and was comfortable in my size 10 jeans. I guess I just feel sometimes like I did all that hard, hellish work (5am workouts) for nothing. Ok not for nothing....I would do anything in the world for my sweet, precious angel. Again, its just hard I guess. So I have decided to wallow in my own self disgust for one whole day and then tomorrow I will put my head back up and move on and if I need 2 sandwiches for lunch, I will eat my turker on wheat guilt free (both of them). I will continue to exericse when I can and eat healthy foods and feel proud of my baby body! I know I will get my body back, but right now I have better things to worry about....like decorating my girl's nursery and getting everything ready for her big arrival!!